Tiring…

What's up in Kyoto LogoI’m tired today, but even so I have the impression, I didn’t accomplish much. That’s because I spent most of my day entering events into the What’s Up In Kyoto calendar. It’s a very boring and repetitive task, and still not quite as easy as it sounds.

Many of the events I enter have descriptions only in Japanese, and no homepage to go to for a quick copy/paste into google. That means that I have to literally paint the kanji into google translate, which is time-consuming, and sometimes, the translations are … let’s say: interesting. Often, I also need to scan the flyers and postcards, but that’s a minor issue. My “favourite” ones are those where it is not clear where the event is taking place. Just today I threw out three or so where I only found out after googling that the event was somewhere in Tokyo.

At least the calendar program keeps improving. Tockify continuously adds little features that make my life easier. Now I can save addresses that I often use which is a big time saver. So, in the best case I can add an exhibition, in, say a gallery I already have in the database, within 5 minutes (including the scanning of the postcards, which I do in bulk when I get them.) In the worst case, it can take up to 15 minutes when I need to find out what exactly that Kanji mean, which kind of Buddhist ceremony it is and where I have to go for it… No wonder I only managed some 25 events today.

It’s getting much better though. And I have very nice and relaxing plans for the upcoming weekend!

Stereotypes?

Today was a wonderful spring day with blue sky, a bit of a breeze and pleasant temperatures. So, it was a good day to do laundry and put it out on the balcony to let it dry. And I noticed that in the building opposite of mine several men were doing this chore!

This surprised me. When I grew up, laundry was definitely a women’s job, and probably not just in my family. And I know that Japanese society is rather… macho, with predefined roles for men (working in a company) and for women (working for the kids). However, a (male) friend of mine has told me that in private, things may be very different. According to him, he knows businessmen who play tough all day, but are very happy to go home and cook dinner there – every night! I also know some Japanese men who are excellent cooks, but I am wondering how prevalent this really ist.

I know that Japanese society is quick to punish people who do not conform, but as long as you keep things private, a lot is possible, really! But that also means that change will be very, very slow. And the young woman I once saw driving a cement mixer will probably remain an exception for quite a while… Cement Mixer in Japan.

Heian Jingu

Heian Jingu is among the newest shrines of Japan. It was built in 1895 as part of the Industrial Exhibition Fair, to commemorate the 1100 year anniversary of the establishment of Kyoto, then known as Heian-kyo. In the beginning, Heian Jingu only enshrined emperor Kanmu, the founder of Kyoto. However, in 1940, emperor Komei was deified and, as the last emperor to reside in Kyoto, was also enshrined here. The shrine is popular with the locals because it was an attempt to halt Kyoto’s decline after the capital had moved to Tokyo – and it did work! So, when it burnt down completely due to arson in 1976, it only took three years to rebuild it. Today, Heian Jingu is considered an Important Cultural Property.

Heian Shrine Main HallHeian Jingu as a whole is a replica of the ancient imperial palace Daidairi, built at the founding of Kyoto, and destroyed in 1227. The shrine is built in the official compound structure style Chodo-in, on a 5/8-scale of the original. The final designs were made by architectural historian Ito Chuta, and the colorful buildings and vast spaces between them have a distinct Chinese charm, that was very popular during the Heian period. It also gives the shrine a grand and stately atmosphere.

The first building to greet visitors in the impressive, two-storey Otenmon gate in vermillion, green, and white, once the main gate of the old Heian palace. However, the official entrance to the shrine is 500 m further to the south, at the huge torii, one of Kyoto’s landmarks. Interestingly, the torii was erected only in 1929, when, with a hight of 24,4 m and legs that boast a diameter of 3,6 m, it was the largest torii in Japan.

Torii of Heian ShrinePassing through the Otenmon gate, the shrine opens up into a large courtyard, at the north of which lies the Daigokuden, the Great Hall of State, where once the emperor conducted the state affairs. The Daigokuden is divided into three parts: In the Gaihaiden front shrine, people come to worship and buy good luck charms. Behind it lies the inner sanctuary, which was once used only for imperial ceremonies, but today, shinto ceremonies like weddings or the popular shichi-go-sai shrine visits for kids take place here. At the very back lies the main sanctuary, where the kami are enshrined and only the priests have access.

Heian Shrine Blue Dragon TowerAt the eastern and western end of the courtyard lie two towers called Soyru-ro (blue dragon tower) and Byakko-ro (white tiger tower), respectively. Those two animals are guardians of the east and west, and they also adorn two fountains nearby the entrance. Of course, there are also guardians of the north (Genbu, a black snake-turtle) and south (Suzaku, a vermillion bird). Images of the four animals can also be found on the iron lanterns present throughout the shrine.

The blue dragon wellA very interesting feature of Heian Jingu is its large public garden, 33.000 square metres hidden behind the buildings. Construction on the Shinen Garden, which is divided into four parts, started in 1895, but it took 20 years to complete. Today, the entrance is at a gate at the western end of the courtyard, and directly behind it lies the South or Heian Garden, with some 200 species of plants that are mentioned in Heian era literature. It is also the resting place of Japan’s oldest street car that once ran through Kyoto.

Further along the path lie the West, Middle, and Eastern Gardens. They were designed by famous Kyoto gardener Ueji VII (aka Jihei Ogawa), whose style is readily recognized. Unusual for a Shinto garden, Shinen is centered around large ponds that draw water from the Lake Biwa Canal, and are home to rare turtles and fish.

Stepping Stones in Shinen GardenIn the West Garden, Byakko-Ike pond shows about 2000 Irises, representing the 200 species that grow in Japan. The Middle Garden follows with Soryu-ike pond that is crossed by stepping-stones called Garyuko. They were once part of old Sanjo and Gojo bridges built in the 16th century. However, the East Garden is the largest one, with Seiho-ike pond at its center, and many weeping cherries all over. The big attraction here is the covered bridge Taiheikaku, a gift from the imperial palace in the 1970s. The ceremonial hall Shobikan, that is reached after crossing the bridge, was also an imperial gift, today it is used for the weddings that take place at the shrine.

Taiheikaku Bridge in Heian Jingu. Heian Jingu is popular among tourists and locals alike. The gardens are a must-see in every season (although most famed during cherry blossoms) and the shrine itself is a popular destination for locals for their hatsumode visit or the Adult Day celebrations.

Watashi Mo!

Japanese GeishaIt’s International Women’s Day!

While I do not call myself a feminist (for various reasons) I do applaud the new strength the women’s movement has gathered worldwide to push equality of the sexes. Not all the ideas are good in my opinion, but at least, there’s a discussion going on that will move things forward. It’s good to see empowered women protesting all over the planet, and in Spain, even shutting down the country with their strikes. It’s time for us to be taken seriously!

In Japan, things are moving much more slowly. The society is very reluctant to change, and while there are some women who expose themselves publicly in the fight for women’s rights, the majority is silent, even though they may agree.

One Japanese woman who is not silent at all is Shiori Ito, who has become the face of #metoo in Japan. She was raped in 2015, and after a long battle to get the man – a personal friend of the prime minister, apparently – prosecuted, the case was finally thrown out, possibly on intervention from really high up. Yes, rape is a crime in Japan, but as in so many other countries, it can be very difficult to get a conviction, even if the evidence supports the victim’s claims.

Shiori Ito is still not silent, she is trying to fight not just her own, but the bigger fight. Despite receiving a lot of backlash over her action – also from other women in Japan – she strives to change attitudes and procedures that rape victims face in this country. I hope she does succeed in this, so that soon, it will be indeed a Happy International Women’s Day for everyone!

Read up on Shiori Ito in this piece of the Tokyo Weekender, published some time last month.

Compliments

Overcoming the barriers between cultures is extremely difficult. Often, both sides operate from a basis of implicit cultural expectations that are completely incomprehensible to the other side. When this happens combined with a language barrier, then it’s possible that all hell breaks loose – or at least, that people end up extremely disappointed.

A Japanese friend of mine likes to date foreigners. She says she’s not like the typical Japanese girl, and she doesn’t want a typical Japanese guy either. She thinks that foreigners are more open to non-traditional roles in a relationship, which is something important to her. Recently, she has started dating a man from the middle east, and we got to talk about the interesting problems she’s facing:

First of all, there’s the language barrier. None of them speaks the other’s language, so they meet in the middle and speak English with each other. In such a case, of course, mistakes happen. You use one word that you think means something, but your partner understands something else. Or, you both understand the word in general, but in this particular context you should have used another one.

For example, the other day, my friend asked her boyfriend whether he was “taking their relationship seriously”, and now she’s worried because he doesn’t text her as much as usual. I had to explain to her that he probably understood she wanted to “get married and have babies soon”, and that his reaction was quite normal for a guy after such a short relationship. She explained what she meant with her question and I suggested the word “exclusive” instead.

Things like this happen all the time, so that’s no big deal, and probably something to laugh about later. The second, bigger issue to overcome, however, is the culture clash between two people. Different cultures have different expectations or even rules for how to do things and what is “normal”. Even if doing essentially the same things, doing them at different speeds may lead to total bewilderment on both sides.

For example, I once read research about American GIs dating British girls after WWII. Interestingly, the British girls found the Americans too pushy and fast, whereas in turn, the American boys thought the British to loose with their morals. What had happened? Obviously, there was no language barrier, so something else must have turned both sides off. The solution was: different cultural expectations of dating, in particular: of kissing. Apparently, the first kiss happens quite early in an American relationship, while in Britain, the first kiss between a couple was at a stage much closer to sex. So, while the girls thought their Americans were too pushy with the first kiss, the boys were nonplussed why they were allowed to storm the castle so quickly… Funny, isn’t it?

Anyway, back to my friend who has another type of cultural problem: Compliments. Her boyfriend has a nickname for her, says things like “you are my moon” etc., and pays all their expenses together. She find this odd, almost uncomfortable, and doesn’t know how to react. According to her, Japanese guys don’t do that at all. I explained that Arabic is a quite flowery language, and that she should just lean back and enjoy the attention. And possibly read some Persian or Arabic love poetry (or 1001 Nights) to get in the right frame of mind.

In return, she makes him compliments like “you are so handsome”, which are greatly appreciated and apparently expected by Japanese guys, but make her boyfriend rather uncomfortable. She says in Japan, girls are supposed to make boys compliments because the man has the higher ranking in Japanese society, and any woman can call herself lucky to marry a good guy, so she needs to keep him happy – with compliments. I explained that in western society, the woman is the one to receive the compliments and that it is expected for men to raise the woman onto a pedestal, in particular when dating. And I suggested that she makes him compliments that are more focused on inner values like “you are so smart”, because western men seem to prefer those.

So, all in all it’s very interesting how different languages and different cultures make any relationship, let’s say: “interesting”. A romantic relationship is even more complicated under these circumstances. In any case: I have learned something as well! Maybe I should go out and make my own experiences? 😉

No One’s Perfect

No One’s Perfect
Hirotada Ototake

Cover of No One's PerfectIn Japan, everything has to be just perfect, so there are rules for everything: How deep to bow, how to answer the phone, how to dress, in short, how to live. Everything has to be just so, and not any other way, and if you dare to be different, you practically make yourself an outcast.

Hiro is most certainly not perfect. He was born with tetra-amelia syndrome, a gene-defect that left him without arms and legs. But he is no outcast. The first thing his mother says to him when she first sees him – three weeks after his birth and hitherto unaware of his condition – is “He’s adorable”, and Hiro takes it from there.

He visits normal schools and tries to do what other kids do, and his favourite subject is PE, where he signs up for basket ball, runs laps, and takes part in the sport meetings like all the other kids. He is always outspoken about what he wants and often ends up as the leader of various groups. Only when at university, he decides to do what no one else can do: campaign for a barrier-free world. And this is what he is still doing today.

Hirotada Ototake was born in 1976 in Japan, only one of seven people worldwide with tetra-amelia syndrome. Throughout his life he insisted on leading a normal life as much as possible despite his handicap. He worked as a schoolteacher, TV presenter, speaker, writer, and presently lives in Tokyo.

This book is a fascinating read, because Hiro focuses on what he can do instead of what he cannot do. It is very uplifting to see him so determined, so positive throughout his life. Only a single chapter of the book deals with the difficulties he must be facing every single day, like not having wheelchair access, or not being able to buy a coffee from a vending machine. But he seems to take all this in his stride, and when you read the book you have the impression he lives a life as perfect as can be…

A very inspiring and uplifting book, available on Amazon.

Faux Pas

Japan has given the world the automated bidet toilet where people can wash their nether regions after use with the push of a button. Today, more than 80% of the Japanese households have these kinds of toilets, and they are becoming more and more popular in the West as well.

Toilet slippers in Japan
photo by Crispin Semmens, wikimedia commons.

However, one thing that is unlikely to spread to the western world is the use of toilet slippers. Those are usually very cheap, easy to clean slippers, that are used in the toilet – and only in the toilet! They are provided mostly in restaurants where you have to take off your shoes, but also some private homes are using them. You are supposed to remove your usual slippers in front of the toilet, use the toilet slippers while inside doing your business, and then switch slippers again when returning to the main part of the house.

The idea behind toilet slippers is, that there are “clean” and “unclean” parts to a house. The outside is generally seen as “unclean”, that’s why you are asked to remove your shoes when entering a Japanese home. Traditionally, the toilet was outside of the house, and people would have to literally step out of the house and put on their shoes to go there. Even in modern homes, the toilet is often located nearby the entrance or as far away as possible from the main living area. Many houses have the bathroom and toilet (two rooms, actually) on the first floor, and the bedrooms on the third floor, which I find rather inconvenient – what if you’re sick?

Anyway, one of the bigger faux pas that a foreigner can commit is to use the toilet slippers – and then forget to change to the normal ones again, and going back to the livingroom wearing the ones designated for the toilet. It happened to me twice already… In my defense: it was winter both times, and those were very nice, fluffy and warm toilet slippers. I was with friends in both cases, and their reaction surprised me: They were laughing their heads off at the silly foreigner! I was very surprised at this reaction, I thought people would be offended by me making their home dirty. But they just found it extremely funny. Oh yes, the Japanese: you never know what you can expect…

Preview…

March is almost here, and today was a wonderful day that felt like spring, almost. The sun was shining, there were blue skies… but the wind was a bit strong, so my bicycle ride to my afternoon meeting was not quite as pleasant as I had expected. Still, the weather is very nice at the moment, I don’t need my heater that much right now, and I am seriously considering to end my livingroom confinement soon, and moving back to my office and bedroom.

It seems that this year indeed, the cherry blossoms will be a bit earlier, just as predicted. Right now, there is nothing at all to be seen here in Kyoto, of course, but I have found a really lovely picture of Himeiji castle during hanami.

Himeiji Castle during Cherry Blossoms
copyright: Himeiji City

The renovations on Himeiji castle have been finished, so maybe I can make it down there this year. It is said to be the most beautiful castle in all Japan, so I definitely have to go there eventually…

Not Getting Out Of Bed!

A friend of mine just sent me a link to the video below, it’s a very cute Japanese song and anime with the title “I’m not getting out of bed” or literally, out of the futon. It tells a story every Japanese can relate to:

When you wake up in the morning and you have to get up, but it’s really, really too cold to step out of bed…
When the room is finally warm enough, but you now have to go to the toilet, but it’s really, really too cold to leave the room…

To all my European friends who suffer from the extreme cold there at the moment: I feel for you! If you can’t enjoy the cold, at least enjoy the cute penguin!

Party!

Just a very quick update:

I was out tonight with a couple of friends for a small party. We went to one of those tiny little Okonomiyaki places where you eat the food from a hot plate in front of you. There was quite a bit of alcohol involved as well. And afterwards we went to the Okura Hotel where we had some dessert to wrap things up.

I had a lovely evening, it was fun to chat and eat and drink and…